Masking It – Thurs 17th Nov 2016
By Jeannette | November 17, 2016
Normally, on a Thursday, we’re looking forward to Friday, to the meal that D gets so excited about and the fact that weekend is near.
Unfortunately, for the second Thursday running, D’s arrived home in tears. A classic example (or two) of her masking her emotions until she gets home, to her “sanctuary”.
Last week’s tears and then anger were over the fact that she’d felt “rushed” during after school club. This one is a new experience for her – band practice with her flute – and the band leader wasn’t known to her (stranger angst) and D felt like she was under pressure to try out new things, quickly.
Something which didn’t go down well and D, being shy and wanting to be polite for fear of “getting told off” didn’t say anything but just wound herself up more and more until she got home.
A note in the home-school diary followed, asking whether D’s flute teacher (not the same person) and whom D is used to, could maybe practice with her in their (paid for) lessons didn’t even get a response or an initial to say it had been read, which isn’t great when you know that, unless I can let D know an outcome, she’ll worry herself about the next time. So, an email to the music department yesterday and it’s all sorted.
This is where it’s frustrating, D’s school are briliant at events, at integration with other schools but there seems to be the general feeling from her class teachers that she’s now 12, she’s in secondary, she should be able to speak up for herself and say something. Well, in an ideal world she no doubt would! D’s anxieties, like her autism, aren’t something she’s going to “grow out off”, she’ll learn to cope but if she comes home crying of course I’ll intervene, because she’s too worried about speaking up.
Anyway, that aspect at least is sorted, she practised in her flute lessons and music staff reassured Hubbie when he collected her yesterday (after another club) that all should be okay.
Today’s tears were because she was uncomfortable, they’d been sat practising and her knee had started hurting. She hadn’t wanted to say, or move thanks to her worries so got more and more inwardly stressed until she got home. Have you ever tried (trying to) catch a potentially bolting child after surgery on both feet? Me neither, until today, ouch!
But it’s all ended with little giggles anyway as I showed her that maybe rotating her ankles will help if it happens again.
Next week I’d love to see a smiling D burst through the door, eager to either tell me how it went or at least – and more likely – a little smile before she heads over to look at My Little Pony images over and over on her iPad.
Hope so, Jx 
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