Best laid plans – Fri 26th Feb 2016
By Jeannette | February 26, 2016
One of the things I’ve learnt about parenting our autistic children is to expect the unexpected.
Strange you might think, as one of the traits for our two is a need for detail and for routine. At times, an obsessive need, for example, T will need to know where we’re going, how we’ll get there and the route and timings, timings down to the minutest detail.
Anyhow, yesterday D was excited about a “bad hair day” at school, to raise money for Great Ormond Street, she loved the hair accessories I’d bought and couldn’t wait. Fab, we thought.
Today D woke up crying, which progressed to crying and rocking, whilst being unable to say what was wrong, such was her distress.
She had anxieties about the “bad hair day”, that coupled with the fact that she had an offsite trip too, just meant way too much change for our girl, she literally couldn’t process or handle it.
We compromised. The bad hair day didn’t happen for D and a lot of other children didn’t participate too. The staff did and there were some weird and wonderful hair styles as we went in. But not for D, it was a toss-up between asking her to join in, hoping for the best but – bearing in mind her worries – being fearful that she’d be emotional all day or, recognising that it was all too much and settling for getting her into school. Which is what we did.
And she overcome her fears, went on the school trip and appeared this afternoon, smiling with two certificates – one for doing well in PE and one for House points.
Definitely a case of “expect the unexpected”, I could add in the “keep calm and carry on” too, because that’s what we do.
We have to.
We wouldn’t have it any other way bar a little bit more of acceptance of autism please, something that isn’t always immediately visible but very much a part of so many people’s lives.
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