They’re Back – Sun 4th Oct 2015

By | October 4, 2015

Anxieties, that is.

Back with D big time.  She should be looking forward to school tomorrow.  Note the should.  

Alternate Monday’s bring a lunchtime Beauty Club (she has Science Club the other times) and it’s when volunteers come in and paint fingernails for the attendees, or style hair or demonstrate how to apply make-up.  It’s a fab idea and one of the reasons that D was most looking forward to heading into secondary.   A way to increase confidence and pick up some tips from the volunteers.   The last time D attended she had her nails painted red with white dots and spent quite a while counting all the dots that evening on each hand – 51 on each, they used a little nail template apparently.

But she’s not looking forward to tomorrow, in fact she’s twisted herself up into knots (sometimes literally when it comes to her clothes/my arms) because she’s worried about another attendee.  One who D hasn’t got the confidence to stand up to and the other knows it.

It’s an ongoing issue, the fact that D won’t speak up either at break time or lunchtime, she worries she’ll get “told off for being badly behaved”.  And so she’ll build it up within the school environment until 3.15pm and I’ll know instantly that she’s not okay because of her face when she comes down the stairs.  

There’s not a lot I can do, apart from remind her that she wouldn’t be told off if she spoke to a teacher if another pupil is calling her names etc and that she’ll enjoy Beauty Club if she allows herself too.

Because of the above, practically every task has had an accompaniment of anxieties, whether it’s been meal time, reading her school book or a hair wash.

Sunday is meant to be a day of rest traditionally isn’t it? Just not for those angst, worries and fears that take up so much of D’s energy – if she lets them.


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