Our Darling D – Weds 20th May 2015

How can you be eleven years old already? Where has that time gone?

We moved into our house six weeks before you were due and, in typical D fashion, you arrived early, you just couldn’t wait to get out into the world.  

You love to hear how you were born in our bedroom, by choice and not because we didn’t make the hospital in time.  It was bliss to climb into our bed at home and not have to worry about ward noise or visiting hours or having to hurry in the bathroom.  Lovely.  Like you say, we “lifted up the covers and there you were wriggling”.

You’ve packed a lot into your first 11 years, some expected, some not so.  It was very hard to accept the doctor giving you a lifelong “label” at age 4.5 but that intervention meant that you could be placed in the most appropriate educational setting for you and boy, have you flourished!

When we were first debating the mainstream versus SN school, a very lovely teacher from your mainstream nursery gave me a big hug and said “I’ve known people with autism go to university”.  It was her way of saying “keep positive, just wait and see” and from the very first day, we could see how much more relaxed you were in your new SN school.   

We had to choose between whether we wanted you to stay in a mainstream school and take exams (not yet! At age 16) or go to SN school and learn life skills.  It was a massive decision because you couldn’t read or write and no-one could say if you would, it was just a case of waiting …. and hoping, whilst knowing that you’d be happier in the smaller class sizes with more staff.

You have surpassed expectations, our wonderful girl.  You don’t like writing but you have a go, usually with a few moans and groans.  As for reading, well … you love the Rainbow Fairies series and the Daisy books.  You read those with enthusiasm, as well as road signs, text messages, everything!

Your vocabulary has increased too.  You had some Speech and Language therapy because your speech was very stilted and you’d get your pronouns muddled, also sequencing was an issue.  Now, we walk to school arm in arm and, moods permitting, you’ll chatter away.  

Sometimes you don’t have a good day, sometimes you get a bit overwhelmed by other pupils and you come down the stairs from class and bolt into a corner, but you always tell me what’s wrong (even though it may be hours later).

Speaking of walking, it’s been over a year since we’ve had to use your buggy.  Something that my back is very grateful for, because you’re nearly as tall as me!  We’ve been to town without the buggy and walked around when it was quiet (inset day), looking at all things girly and sparkly.

  
At your age, most parents would be thinking about the “P” word (puberty).  You galloped full speed ahead into that realm three years ago and although you hate your monthly injections, you understand why you need to have them.  Clever girl.

You are our little songbird when you’re happy.  This week you’ve been learning “War” by Frankie Goes To Hollywood and occasionally will burst into “War….huh! What is it good for?” during some very random moments.  

You sang in the Christmas concert last year at school, which was a very proud moment and another example of how far you’ve come at SN school, because you were too overwhelmed and scared to even enter the hall in mainstream, let alone join in assemblies or plays.

One thing we’ve learnt is that autism doesn’t have a set timetable, you’re doing things at your own pace, when you are comfortable and that is the best way to be.

I don’t know what the next 11 years will bring but we will always be there for you, encouraging you to achieve whatever you feel you can.  I know your school will help in finding college places or work placements, if you feel confident with that, but whatever you do, as long as you’re happy, we’ll support you.

You changed our lives 11 years ago, for the better.  There were a couple of horrendous febrile convulsions when you turned blue and stopped breathing which terrified us and we thought the worst, every day with you is a blessing, we are so proud of you.

You and T, you both used to follow me around as a constant shadow, you were (and still are sometimes) “The Pack”.

   
 
I’m linking this post up with #SSAmazingAchievements because the last 11 years have enriched and amazed us.   I hope the next few don’t roll around as fast!

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