Sharing – Mon 18th Aug 2014

The ability to share (and share “nicely”) isn’t something that comes easily to either T or D.

They are both extremely keen on Minecraft and it’s practically the only game they’ll play side-by-side, each within a shared world, working together but separately. It’s nice to see.

What wasn’t so nice was the bust-up they had last week, over a (you’ve guessed it) Minecraft book. There are a series of strategy books and they’d each chosen one as their treat during a town trip – having previously chosen one each – with the proviso that each allows the other to read it if needed, the books all contained different hints and tips.

Both agreed willingly.

They both have different approaches to books, D will carry a favourite with her everywhere day and night, T will place his neatly on his bookshelf, books arranged by theme and author, he doesn’t like a book to be scuffed or marked, they all have to be as when bought. Very differing standards.

Anyway, they squabbled big time over the fact that T perceived D as not sharing and D was adamant the book was “her” book, there was tears on both sides, stomps from D, angry protests from T and a very unhappy household.

The obvious answer is to just have duplicates but I would, I really would, like them both to share, to take turns in reading them, to offer each other the chance to read one if interested.

We might just be getting there…

T and D – as well as having lots of fun in the garden between rain showers – had been Minecrafting again today. She was happy, he was happy.

And then T mentioned about the books, but, instead of being defensive and confrontational, he asked if he could read such-and-such one and offered her one of his to read. It was all done in the way Hubbie or I would speak to D, very gently and positive re-inforcement. She agreed and all was well!

T is usually frustrated by the intellectual and emotional variances between him and D, he is 2 years or so above his level, she is 3 or 4 below, so despite there only being 18 months between them, it’s kind of up to 6 emotional and intellectual years, which can make for a challenging time, I can perceive this “gap” widening as they grow older too.

But today, he pitched it just right, they shared and I’m very proud of them. Tomorrow will probably be another story entirely but one happy Mumma tonight.

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