Aftermath – Weds 21st May 2014

By | May 21, 2014

As I mentioned in yesterday’s post, we’ve been looking through old photos. As well as reminding ourselves just how far D has progressed in the last few years, it’s a chance of (maybe) a prompt for her to tell us how it was for her in a mainstream environment. Something, due to her previously stilted and delayed speech, she wasn’t able to do at the time.

It struck me, looking through the photos and reading through the home-school diaries, just how little she was able to participate in a classroom environment. I guess the noises, the smells and the sheer amount of pupils made it a total sensory overload situation for her.

There were times when she’d bolt or lash out and it was difficult to read that this had happened, that a “serious incident” had been logged. It also made me feel guilty and that I was falling her as her parent, what we (in conjunction with the school) did try to impose were the idea of consequences. An outcome to actions. Whether it be the bottom step of the stairs (which she absolutely hated) with a sand timer (a very visually effective tool) or a (in more recent times) gentle discussion as to the implications, we try to ensure that she is aware. It’s important as she grows up.

One of the things that D really struggled with in her SN school is when instances happen to her, she is very sensory and something like a child quickly brushing past her can stay with her for a long while, or a child in the playground calling her a name or hitting her, it all lands inwardly and she builds any emotion up until she sees me and then …we have a bolt situation.

This is one of the reasons we’ve been working in conjunction with the school and CAMHS, to help her gain the confidence to say when she’s unhappy when it happens and not bottling it up, but also to understand that, as she did previously, some children don’t understand that if they hit or push that it has an effect.

Today there was such an incident, but I wasn’t greeted with a bolt, but a smile. D was okay and greeted me holding a piece of paper. She refused to let me see it whilst we were still on school grounds and then showed it to me.


And she was absolutely fine – but very cuddly – telling me of the circumstances, showing me where she’d been hurt and it was very obvious that this letter had brought an end to it quickly for her. Because she had received, read and understood its contents, it was an end of it for her, a very visual end. We then had a chat about how she disliked handwriting and if this child did too, then this must have helped them understand that what they had done had had a consequence.

T has not had such a successful day, he has been troubled by his nemesis in class again. Luckily he has the final of a football tournament to play in with the school team tomorrow, something to look forward to.

I hope everyone’s day has gone well, comments/RTs/shares as ever welcomed, thanks for reading Jx


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