Reflecting and looking ahead plus A Poem For Matthew Jnr #ThisIsAutism

By | April 6, 2014

I realised today that we’ll have been in our home 10 years tomorrow. A lot has happened in the last 10 years.

I mentioned here what a race it was to move in before D arrived, my ever-growing belly was waiting for no-one!

D was born in our bedroom six weeks after we moved, T was a toddling everywhere 18-month old and the first year or so after D’s arrival was a bit of a sleep-deprived blur. Having two children 18 months apart has meant that neither of them could remember a time when the other wasn’t around, we used to call them “The Pack” as, once D could walk, they’d follow me everywhere.

Our house looks quite different cosmetically from the one we moved into. It had quite rotten wooden doors and windows, which were replaced with UPVC white ones. Everywhere (and I mean everywhere) had very bright orange paint, some rooms were orange and yellow but it was predominantly orange. Nothing wrong with orange but it was a bit overwhelming.

The front garden was a mass of spiky bramble bushes and the back had a raised neglected herb garden and weeds, plenty of them. In time, the back garden has seen plenty of garden toys, been bark-chipped, then back to grass, had 3 chickens in a playhouse and fun, lots of fun. The front has been fenced and there’s lots of butterfly and bee friendly plants. In the left of the picture below is a tree we brought from our old house and we all used to run around it humming the Benny Hill theme tune, chasing each other. Something T and D still enjoy doing!

Of course, the last ten years have also
seen autism diagnoses for D (at age 4.5) and T (at age 10, but we “knew” for ages before that, so it wasn’t a surprise, more of a relief that he would (hopefully) be able to access support if required).

Looking back made me wonder about the next ten years, both T and D will be close to finishing their education by then. Something I can envisage T “coping” with, with support, I’m not so sure about D. I cannot imagine her sustaining a relationship or an independent life. I hope that Society has changed a bit by then, to become more accepting of invisible disabilities.

Whatever happens, we will ensure that they have their “base”, our home. The one D was born in, the only one T remembers.

This Is Autism

I still have a few spaces left for nightly guest posts on autism-related topics, please email me at autismmumma at aol dot com if you’d like to feature.

Tonight’s guest post comes from @YoungDadddy, someone I’ve only recently connected with on twitter. He has written a poem for his son, Matthew Junior, which encompasses the hopes and feelings that I can certainly empathise with.

For My Little Man:

“Don’t be mad, don’t be sad or feel bad for me, don’t say sorry because there’s no need to be.

Yes, my child has autism as some of you can see,
but to me my child is no different then you or me.

Yes, going out at times may be a task, but the looks from others faces often makes me laugh, cause when I look at him what do I see?
A beautiful baby boy smiling at me.

He may not like change this is true.
He can even throw a tantrum out of the blue.
Certain noises can make him mad.
And staring at you is something he may not do.

At times he wants to be alone but always comes running back with a smile.
So you may say he’s different but I say not at all he’s still my baby boy, unique and all.

My little guy was diagnosed last month which helped explain allot what has been going on just recently we discovered why he would have a meltdown every day at 6pm, it was because the sun would start to set so we keep him occupied till the sun is down and keep all the lights on in a attempt to get him to not notice. So far it is working.

He loves his stuffed doggy for comfort and always runs to his big sister who is a year older, those are the two things that can calm him down easiest, he loves his big sister.”




Facebook Comments


Coombe Mill (Fiona) on 7th April 2014 at 7:01 am.

Sounds like you have your hands full with your unique and special little boy. A beautiful poem that shows so much insight and understanding.


Jeannette on 8th April 2014 at 7:58 pm.

Thanks Fiona, it was a lovely poem to share 🙂 very grateful I was able to

Reply on 7th April 2014 at 7:35 am.

I bet those 10 years flew by now that you look back on them? #MagicMoments


Jeannette on 8th April 2014 at 7:59 pm.

They definitely did, roll on the next ten (I think!!)


Kim Carberry on 7th April 2014 at 8:16 am.

Fab post! Beautiful poem!


Jeannette on 8th April 2014 at 7:59 pm.

Thanks Kim 🙂


Redpeffer on 7th April 2014 at 8:37 am.

I bet it feels like yesterday you moved in, doesn’t time fly. And I really enjoyed the poem too.


Jeannette on 8th April 2014 at 7:59 pm.

It definitely has just whizzed by 🙂


Charly Dove on 7th April 2014 at 2:33 pm.

Oh wow wonderful post Jeannette and a fabulous poem too. It’s been said already but I bet those years have flown by. What a great base for T and D too. Lovely post thank you so much for sharing with #whatsthestory


Jeannette on 8th April 2014 at 8:00 pm.

Thanks Charly, very glad we got in and unpacked before D made her appearance (she was early too!)


Jaime Oliver on 12th April 2014 at 7:05 pm.

aww Jeannette what a beautiful post and what an amazing poem by @youngdad!

thanks for linking up with #MagicMoments


Jeannette on 17th April 2014 at 1:29 pm.

Thanks lovely, time has just flown by!!


rebecca beesley on 26th April 2014 at 9:27 pm.

What is it about poems that make me feel emotional – those are lovely words. x


Jeannette on 1st May 2014 at 9:44 am.

Thank you, again so pleased to have featured such a great post x


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