Getting back into it – #WellbeingWednesday

By | February 6, 2019

I haven’t written one of these for a while, have I?

Truth be known, events of last year took their toll on me emotionally (if you don’t know, sepsis in November and the prospect of another foot op this year) and my confidence has nose-dived, I’m not an over-sharer anyway, I’d rather stay silent, feeling that I don’t have any input.

Which is silly, really, because I hoped by starting blogging I might reach out to other parents in a similar situation, juggling continuously and hoping a proverbial ball doesn’t drop!

So, what’s been going on?

Well, our lovely D is suffering a “bit” with anxiety, more anxieties than usual and a far chunk of is connected with my sepsis episode.

For instance, last week, Hubbie was off work as it was too cold to do the planned outside work, the downside of that is, being self-employed, he doesn’t get paid for time off but positively it meant that he could walk D to and from school, saving my feet the journeys as I’m still very much affected by nerve pain (in both the foot that needs another operation and the foot that had sepsis, typical me, it couldn’t be the one foot, could it?!?)

But I could see D’s mind whirring “Why isn’t mum taking me? What’s wrong? Why isn’t she dressed? Will she still be here when I get home? What if she isn’t? What if she’s in hospital again?”

All very valid concerns but unlikely, you get the idea? Sometimes she vocalises these concerns, sometimes they take the form of stomping, finger twisting, scratching, silence, all outlets for her.

I do reassure her but I am aware that if I need to say “owwwwwww, silly feet!” I need to say it out of her earshot, not adding to her worries.

She’s also busy at school, she is 14 but school are planning for beyond school, more life skills trips, trying out new foods every week (some more successfully than others) and lessons on budgeting to furnish a room, all very useful but D takes it to mean that she HAS to leave home when she’s an adult, not that it’s a choice … which leads to more anxieties.

T is busy too, preparing for not only GCSEs this year but also another round of pre exams next month.

He is very good at masking emotions during the school day, taking them out of a FIFA game at night and more recently a bit of plastered wall and some tiles, which is concerning and hopefully his stresses will ease after the exams (and pre exams).

He’s still very involved in this football, this has always been his outlet but it doesn’t seem fair that his mainstream secondary school is inflicting these further pre exams on the students when they are pressuring and focusing on anticipated grades.

And me (haha!).. If you follow me on Instagram, you’ll have noticed that I’ve been posting a picture daily with a gratitude message (the link to my instagram account is here), this is something that has really helped me focus on positivity, which is turn helps my wellbeing. Pictures can vary from the robin that we always see on the way to school, to things that have caught my eye, to the occasional bit of crochet but it’s something that I enjoy doing and I hope those who follow me enjoy seeing the pictures.

I need to say thank you too, I’ve been nominated in the BAPs awards in the Wellbeing category and also the Making A Difference categories, both were unexpected but I am very grateful and I don’t expect to go through to the next stage but (told you, zero confidence atm!) but thank you so much to whoever included me XX

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