When We Renew Our Vows 

By | July 13, 2018

Hubby and I have been married for 16 years now, together for 18, we married on the second anniversary of our first date, which – thinking about it now – is quite handy because we only have the one date to remember!

We do joke that we’d “have got less time for crime/must be due for parole now” but our marriage is a partnership and boy, has that partnership gone up and down a rollercoaster of experiences and emotions!

I don’t mean that there’s been any challenges from anyone else, just that having two children within 18 months, moving house when six weeks away from giving birth, self employment and those challenges, family illness and bereavement, autism diagnoses, two years of my silly feet saga and now, parenting two autistic teens, they all have their ways that can chink a little bit away at you, it wouldn’t be natural if they didn’t.

One thing we would both love to do, that we haven’t got around to yet, is to renew our wedding vows.  

Not because it’s the “thing to do”, but because – as mentioned above – we have rode the rollercoaster of life and it would mean so much to both of us if we did.

We married in Jersey, with immediate family there and then had a party a couple of weeks later after our honeymoon, it suited us, not having the whole she-bang first up and, as we were paying for everything ourselves, it meant that we kept a constant eye on how the costs were adding up.

At the time, I was in full time employment and opted to save £200 a month towards it, even though we had a small ceremony, it was still pricey but nowhere near as much as the average UK wedding works out at (I think I read an eye-watering figure of £25k recently!)

I (unexpectedly) had a little T-bump when we married too, hidden (although we were delighted) by my bouquet of Jersey freesias on the day and, as you’ll see from the picture, opted for a pale green dress and bolero from Debenhams, it suited our more intimate, relaxed choice of ceremony and wedding.

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Were we to renew our vows, it would have to be somewhere special to us both, for example, there is a lovely Elizabethan castle in St Helier which gets completely cut off by the tide daily and has the most amazing sunsets, as well as all that history surrounding it. Or a holiday combination, but that might feel a bit too touristy for us. 

Either way, it is always useful to take advice from wedding specialists and the confetti.co.uk site is jam-packed full of ideas and tips for wedding planning and inspiration. There used to be a Confetti store in town and, leading up to our wedding, I’d always be in there during my lunch hour, browsing for ideas which we could use.

I guess, wherever and whenever, we do get around to this and for anyone planning a wedding/vow renewal, it’s important to remember that:

It’s your day and others would have to respect this but if there was a certain someone who didn’t get on with a certain someone else, they would just have to button it and set aside their differences for the duration. You can’t please everyone!

Take a moment to laugh and smile and not just for the cameras! Events like these pass by so quickly, enjoy it.

Sometimes it can feel like a lot of pressure from others, they might have pre-conceived ideas about how a wedding should go. Listen but stand your ground, it is your ceremony after all.

And

Whether it’s a registry office for two with hastily grabbed witnesses, or a full-blown (Windsor Castle anyone?) ceremony with trimmings, the actual vows you make and commitment to each other are what matter, not necessarily how many layers of tulle you have…but if tulle makes you happy…….Go For It and Enjoy! 

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