A two-way Motivation #TheMMLinky 

By | April 30, 2018

I’m putting my hand up and apologising because I haven’t felt motivated to join in with this linky for a little while, my lovely co-hosts have kept it going whilst I’ve stepped back, worried a lot and frantically ticked things off a long list.

But, two weeks ago today, that all changed and this happened:

  

My (hopefully) last foot operation to rectify the wonky feet I was left with after my both-feet-at-once operation in October 2016 and then the wish that I now get a matching one to my super-duper right foot after that was rectified in August 2017.

Three operations and three general anaesthetics in 18 months have been tough to deal with, not just for me with the emotional and physical challenges but also for my lovely family, who – in the run-up to this latest one – saw me get more and more anxious, convinced that this one would go wrong, that I wouldn’t wake up from the GA and hence my desperate need to tick items off a list, things that I flatly refused help with because as well as being over-wrought, I was also very stubborn!

Thankfully – albeit after a dodgy dropping blood pressure episode immediately after and in the following hours post-op – all seems to be going well and I simply cannot wait to see what is under the bandages when I head back to the hospital on Tuesday. 

 I know that there will be another six weeks or so with a VERY long pin still in my second toe but – hopefully – to see a non-wonky foot will be fantastic! I’m thinking of popping a little ribbon around the dressings for it to be cut through, silly eh? But it will be a bit of a moment for me! 

I have an advantage over last August’s operation in that my other foot is a happy one, I don’t have the severe nerve damage that was present in my left foot, whilst my right foot was healing, if that makes sense? The (happy, straight) right foot does have a moan occasionally but nowhere near as bad as it was.

So, what is my motivation and why is it two-way? 
 

Simply because my main lesson I’ve learnt from the whole wonky feet saga is don’t give up. I could have done, could have accepted what the (rather horrible) consultant told me, that I “should have been grateful for what they’ve done” even though now, looking back through photos it was blatantly obvious that the both-foot procedure hadn’t work and sure enough, both feet reverted back and in fact got worse before the first remedial op took place.

I waited a long time to initially seek advice about my “plates of meat”, wanting to be sure that T and D could understand the implications of an operation and that their mum would need help with the simplest of things in those first few post-op days and that, more importantly for them, there would inevitably be routine changes.

It hasn’t all been smooth sailing and I was very very close to phoning the hospital the Friday before my latest operation and saying I couldn’t go through with it, but I’m glad I didn’t, for me and for my family.

I went out for a walk today with D, a slow, stick-assisted walk whilst she skipped ahead and it was flipping painful – both at the time and afterwards – but it was a hurdle that needed to be beaten, to prove to myself that yes, I might be slow today but every day will bring a bit more healing.

My ask of you? 

If there is something that you’ve been putting off for you – a smear, a mammogram, a check-up – book it! It will not only be a weight off your mind but it all helps to ensure that you are healthy and can better cope with the challenges that life brings.

And also, unless it’s raining, I really do need to get out walking every day, to increase the strength and help circulation. Remind me please x 

Now to the Linky, thank you to those who linked up last time, it’s lovely how the motivation keeps coming, in very individual ways.

I loved reading about Tink gaining a little bit more independence in Kelly’s post and Kitt’s very inspirational story via Kate.

Really looking forward to reading your posts, please join in and link up below and let’s share some motivational moments! 


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